the journey of life

11th of December 2008, it has all ended, the end. An ending to be celebrated of, or is it vice versa? Life in form 6, in secondary school has ended, quite reluctantly. A journey that has stretch me to my limit, broadened my vision, built me up holistically as a person. before the end i were crying for it to end, however by the time i reach it, i was so desperate that everything can continue as it is. From 15th of May 2007 to 11th of Dec 2008, this was the golden years of my life, a time duration where i felt most lively, happy and enjoyed.

Start from the beginning i know this would be real tough, all this while i knew it is gonna be a real test for me in this year, God hinted me of what lies ahead last December, strange feelings of big things happening ahead of me during last dec. i started being very stress from the beginning, my emotions were very unstable throughout the year, but thank God He hold me through. So many happenings in this year, revival meetings, youth church events, but all i could do was just stay at home, saying no to these was a real struggle for me.

My spiritual life at a point was at the lowest that i have ever been, very dry, thirst for God yet im not reading the bible nor during devotion at some time, almost died spiritually. And once again, really thanks for the mercy and grace of God, His compassion on me that He did not give up on me, really thank God for that..

And late in June till Dec, my strength were push to the limit when i have to take over the functioning printing company for a short peroid of time, it might be ok if i wouldn't have tos tudy for my STPM, but with stpm, i am put into a real test. Stress level build up to another threshold, i cried for times, asking God why do all these heppens, i wasn't sleeping very well at night, woke up a few times while sleeping, i do not know seriously i did i survive that..

And finally, everything ends, stpm has ended, now i can take a deep breath. When i look back now, all i can see is the grace of God, the mercy and strength that He has given me, is all Him..I wouldn't do all this if it is by my own strength, but with God, im willing...

The run to the end

Just manage to squezz out this time to write a little bit here, haha, happy! Well, life has not been easy, test after test, not exams, but test of life, character, and values. But just really want to thank God for so many things, so many happenings in my life, really glad to my papa in heaven!

First of all, really thank God for one thing, one of the most wonderful thing that can happen in my life. I have started courtship with a girl who we come to know each other since young, grow together in church, serve together. Really thank God that we prayed and seek His face before we move on to another level of relationship, and really thank God for this wonderful blessing in my life, and to God, we ought to build a holy relationship which will bring blessings to people around us, I love You Jesus, I love you babe!

Well, thats the nice part, and what follows will be a bit..

Its already 8th of September, just 62 days away from the STPM. Finally it has almost come to an end, but the end seems so near yet so far, time is ticking every second, so do my heartbeat is pumping faster and faster as the end reaches. Stress level is building up, beyond the treshold I could say. Its a do or die scenario, and almost no way back from this. Consideration and decision-making would follow soon, can I do this all by myself? No, I couldn't. I would fall apart and fail everything I do, but He is full of mercy and grace, and by His mervy and grace I can certainly do this! Haha, Amen!

Dedicated to Jesus:

To God I seek His face, and through Him I find joy and peace
For He said I am the way the truth and the life
He will lead the way and I will just follow
Wherever He leads me and whatever Hes ask of me
I will just do it, just for the sake of Him

Laminin---The Cross in our body

Amazed, blown away...What can I say, this is God's act to the fullest, speechless..Don't know what I mean? Check this out:

Now you know what I meant? This truly blown me away, laminin is a protein in our body that practically glue us together, glued our organelles, cells, organs together. It is an essential constituent of the plasm membrane. So basically without laminin, we would fall in to parts.

Its truly astonishing, this truly prove that we were hand-picked and hand-made by God, every single one of us, you and me...Jesus hold us together all the time, no matter you are sad or happy, He is always IN us! Just commit yourself to Jesus, let go of your burden to Him, He will hold you tight, hug you all the time, be with you whenever you needs Him or at times that you think you don't need Him! Its really simple, because He loves you...

P/S: For more references regarding protein laminin, you can click on to the following links:

http://www.bdbiosciences.com/discovery_labware/products/display_product.php?keyID=238

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Laminin

I will rise, on eagles' wings

Come live in me, all my life, take over..

Come breath in me, and I will rise, on eagles' wings..

Thank God, thank You Jesus, yes I do Jesus, yes I know father, thanks...Business fills my life recently, really busy and tired, exshausted...But thank You Jesus, I will rest in You, I will find peace in you, I will find joy in You....

Tears of helplessness...

Recently, life has not been that tough before. Wake up at 6am, end up at home at 7pm. I will have to go to school in the morning, and afternoon will be traveling around the whole Klang Valley, its exhausting for me, really tired at both the ends. And while I was still pushing for more, my body decided to hold me back and say, Kenneth, that's it, I have had enough!

That forces me to take a day off my studies and work, this was my first time after years. Felt helpless, nothing I could do to change anything now, all I can do was to rest and let my body recover. Its tough for me, having so many things on the line, helpless I could say. On Sunday morning I went to church, one particular song touched the deepest end of my heart, it certainly did...

当我感到软弱无助

你能力显得完全

我要全心的相信

你神迹如此真实

不是自己依靠实力

乃是依靠你的灵

我要全心的相信

你神迹如此真实

I wept like a kid in front of Jesus. Why am I so stubborn at times? Why do I always depend on myself?  My heart was broken once again, only to be rebuild by the Holy Spirit and by the love of God. Not by my strength nor wisdom, but by the Spirit of the living God! Dear Father, I just want to walk with You, hold You tight and finish this tun with You...I love you Jesus....

Happy Birthday, to YOU!

Friday was a special day for a very special person to me, she is really special in the sense that she is from God, for me! She is a very beautiful, nice, and charming girl, God-loving sister. Having to know her so deeply since last year, she is really special to me now. So last thursday I went to night market together with her, had a very wonderful time, then sang a birthday song to her with a small piece of chocolate mud cake. Just hope that she would be happy and enjoy the time. May God bless her with blessings from heaven, fill her with the Holy Spirit, and fulfill Your destiny in Her! Well, she is really special, for me, no words can describe...  

This is a pic of her and two little actor and actress during christmas, the one on the right is her little bro! Beautiful, isn't she?

There is only a fine line between life and death...

Talking about life and death, its always a very interesting topic for people to talk to after meal, but not many take it seriously. Its a very very important and serious matter that everyone of us should be aware of, life and death is just separated by a breath...

3 days ago, my class were doing an experiment, the dissection of rats. So to faint and kill the rats, we used ether to do so, the effect of ether on human is pretty mild, if only a huge amount of this chemical is inhaled, then it will cause difficulty in breathing and so on, and if it is too severe, it might lead to death. So happily we did our interesting experiment, and at the end of the experiment, we cleaned our stuff and went back to our class. Job done! We thought....

Then the unexpected happened. One of my friend who went to throw away the waste, came back in a pretty awful condition, he was finding hard to catch his breath, and suffered from headache and  chest pain. At first when we saw this, we knew this is the effect of over inhaling of ether, but we thought that he could recover after resting for w awhile under the fan, but he didn't. Later on he lost all his strength and couldn't walk by himself, then we ran to the PBSM to get the stretcher to get him down to the PBSM room. Now everyone realised how serious this is. we started to do everything we could, including triggering him to vomit, which will help him to eliminate some of the ether. Then, he loses all his strength, and we were trying all we could to keep him awake. I was there when I saw his eyes were not going right, its a symptom when one is going off. There and then, we could have lost him....

But thank God he managed to survived this accident that no one would have expected. There and then he could have lost his life. Its only a breath separating it. And if now you're still taking life for granted, please think twice, because life and death is separated  only by a fine line. And if you are leaving the earth today, do you know where are you heading? A question for everyone  of us to answer, life and death, heaven or hell....

Sometimes, you just have to follow....

Its has been quite tough in the past 2 weeks, life have not been that easy all year long, hmm, but, phew, thank goodness I am still here, still standing...

Last week, the Awakening for Jesus camp was held from the 4-7 of June, its a revival service, its a life changing and nation changing time for Malaysia. I will certainly go, that's a norm. But, due to exams, I have to stay put at home to study. Its so so not me, hmm, its so tough to do something like this. Its just not ME!!!!! Sometimes I do wonder and ask God, why in this period of time? Why you put me in STPM while you are about to pour down your revival in Malaysia? Why do I have to do all these, its so not me...

Its so pain and tough in my heart, especially during the four days revival conference, and after the conference. Its so pain and tough for me when I know others were calling and seeking God to pour down revival to my beloved Malaysia but I could do was just listen to their stories. So many things went through my mind, so many thoughts. Not only this, for the sake of stpm, I have come not so active in ministry, when there are so many things going on, so many doors God is opening for our ministry, all I could do was staying put and study. I don't like this kind of feelings, its not fun, certainly not!

Well, any how, I believe in the risen one, I believe that everything happens according to His plan. Maybe at this moment I couldn't understand, but I am willing to obey dear Lord, I am willing to listen and follow what You've ask me to do, I am willing to surrender my all to You. God told me two things in June,

1st of June-
While we're praying hard in the prayer meeting preparing for the camp, God ask me to look, and then I look to everyone who are praying so hard, crying to God for revival in Malaysia. Then a thought came in: I will pour down my revival to this generation..Thank God, His promise. I played guitar in that meeting, and one of the strings eventually broken, and I took the string and tell God, this is Your promise!!

6th of June-
It was an evangelistic night service, A Trip To Hell. Shared by Ps Philip Mantofa, it was an unforgettable night. The fear of hell and the fear for the lost who might get into hell is just too overwhelming. And during the altar call, I was standing in front of the ladies, due to the mass no. of incoming crowd responding to the altar call. There and then, one thought came into my mind, its from God, He says: Remember today, remember tonight, remember the pain....I will Father, I will remember...

Its a route that God wants me to go through and I believe He has His beautiful plan behind all these. I will follow, I will follow You...

Life is beautiful-Namesake
Chorus:
I have decided, to follow Jesus (x3)
No turning back, no turning back

Though none go with me, still I will follow (x3)
No turning back, no turning back

The cross before me, world behind me (x3)
No turning back, no turning back

Overwhelmed, thanks buddies!!

May--Well today, if you do not know, is the official date for teachers' day. Well, as far as I know, today is not only teachers' day, it is my birthday as well. Hmm, did not expect much, because everyone was busy with teachers' day's stuff in the school and on top of that, our mid term exam is just 5 days away. Hmm, furthermore, I am not a kind of person who takes my birthday so important, just want to thank God and my parents that I am where I am now, to express my gratitude to them. Never thought of any birthday parties, it has never even flash through my mind.

Well, God knows. Haha, well, my 6th form mates have find time to plan this not too surprise party for me (Well, I knew they were up to something in the past few days =P). Hmm, but still, it was too overwhelming for me, I was shivering most of the time when I am cutting the cake, it is too overwhelming for me, though myself never thought of having one for myself, but thank God that He gave me friendsss around to celebrate with me, its really too overwhelming...

Thank God for everything, thank God for everyone of you, thanks everyone, thanks dear all 6th form mates!! Thanks Wan Te, Yun Fatt, Eugene x 2, Guan Tyng , Jonathan, Zhuan, Soon Hong, Adeline, Li lin, Pei Yan, Davina, Sook Ann, Zhi Yee, Joanne, Gin Li, Wen Geey, Yi Kee, Jin Bang, Ghoon Hoong, Yeng Ying, Kok Hooi, and all other friends!!!! Thanks Thanks and may God bless you all!!

That's why God chose young people!

24th May 2008, found some time to write something here, life is so beautiful and exciting....It is nearer and nearer to the Awakening for Jesus Conference in Malaysia, we believe this is a the time for revival to spark across Malaysia, it is NOW!

I was heavily involve in youth ministry, though a youth myself, well, sometimes people do not recognize I am one =P..haha..anyway, just want to share that in the years I have been reaching out to youth, I have sometime comes to a bottle neck, where I suspect whether this is the ministry God has in mind for me. Well, time and time again, God assured me, told me the reasons why He wants to use young people, why He wants to touch young people, and time and time again, this pushes me on and on, and I will never turn back from this..

This is a picture of youth worshipping God, in a4j youth camp. God told me a few things, simple things that makes Him wants to use the young people in this generation to do something no eyes have seen before.

Firstly, because of the PASSION of young people.

When young people really get excited about something, they wouldn't exchange anything for that thing, you see young people getting so excited for their favorite singers, footballers, and we have all heard about young people waiting in the airport for hours just for the arrival of those people. So now just sit back and imagine: When young people's heart get so excited about God, they will just do whatever they could to accomplish the things that God has commanded them to do, because they are passionate of their God, they are fired up to do things for God!

Secondly, the BOLDNESS of young people.

Young people do not think twice while doing things. This has it's positive and negative point of view of it. But generally, we need to have that kind of boldness to really step out for Jesus. Sometimes we knew we need to do something radical to start the spark, we knew but never took action. Boldness is the substance that drives us on to do so. 

In my school, we started praying during recess outside our christian fellowship room, people could see us praying. And on one particular day, I was busy finishing my chemistry report while I asked my member to go on and pray without me. What happened next is amazing. One of their friends saw them praying and they actually observe them while they pray, so when they finish praying, their friends asked them what they were doing, and they answered they were praying. And they asked again what they were praying for, and they answered again they were praying for the school. And they were like:'Wow, praying for the school ar, so great...then can you pray for me too?' This is God in the move, not us! Hallelujah!

Recently, I have started a 6th Form prayer meeting in my school, after sharing with a couple of friends, we have started it. We started praying in front of CF room, then later on move to our class room, and while we are praying our friends passed by. Praise God when we start doing so, one of our non-christian friend joined us and we prayed for him. And we all agreed that this is what God wants us to do, do something radical for the sake of God. And we know that we cannot have the old mindset of saying: Wait, there is no need doing this, others will come and do!' Sometimes it just need a step of faith of a person to spark the fire of revival in your family, your school, your college, university. And that is YOU!

God is calling for the young people of this generation to rise up to the occasion and inherit the promise land God has for us. It is now, it is this generation, a new generation who loves God with all their hearts, minds and souls. This is the time, God is calling for YOU!

All God saints in the latter days

Have you ever heard what the Holy book says

Visions and dreams we all shall see

Holy Ghost fire saturate our beings

Sounds the drums in the heavens beat

Hear the S.O.S form the devil's keep

Time is ticking and the world is dying

RISE UP YOUTH TO THE HOLY CALL!

Life is beautiful..

Life is beautiful isn't it? Hmm, this picture on the left shows my beloved form 6 friends, particularly my U6S classmates. Well, life is so wonderful with all these people that God has placed around me, really thank God for these people, we have really formed a tight bond between each and everyone of us, we laughed together, ate together, go toilet together, visit teachers together, take exams together, suffer together, organize events together....Hmm, its really hard to see an end to this fantastic period of my life, but, things move on, so do us. There might be a day where we might have our own things to be busy with, our own family, own work, own buisness, but all these sweet memory that make up my life will follow me till the end, hmm, life is beautiful not because everything goes smooth for you, it is beautiful because of all the little moments that make up your life. Well, life is just beautiful....

P/S: I strongly recommend one song entitled 'Life is beautiful', meaningful and it touches my heart, and I believe it will touch your heart too!

www.jaesonma.com (Click on to the song under 'Namesake' album)

Go Malaysia, I support YOU!!

Its a great experience visiting the Parliament, really thank God for such an experience, enjoyed and cherish every moment I spent in there, witnessing our YBss presenting their point of view in some issues, really happy~

I've stepped into a place where the governors of the country come together for the good of the country, a place where decisions are made for the people, that can decide the destiny of the country. I felt honored to be able to sit in and listen though only for a short period of time, its my pleasure to be a Malaysian, I am proud to be a Malaysian and I thank God for that. After what we called the 'Politic Tsunami', Malaysia goes on, and I will support Malaysia all the way, for I know there is a reason why God put me in Malaysia, I believe God has His own plan in Malaysia...

Have been praying for Malaysia for quite some time, just couldn't stop to pray for the country. Lets together pray for revival to swept across this nation, pray for God's kingdom to be built here in Malaysia, pray for blessings to fall upon Malaysia!!

Malaysia, my home, my country..

Time Flies~~Lower Six Orientation

12th May, it was yesterday, the orientation day for a new batch of form six student. Well, all I could say is time really flies. A year before, about the same time I was down there listening to the seniors about life of a form six student, how tough can the STPM can be.... 

Well, one year on, now it's my turn now to do all the talking up on the stage. One year have passed!! A mix feelings for me, it was so hard to describe my feelings, touched yet its kind of a reminder for myself, reminding me that I am at the final days of my form 6 life. After going through 1 year in form six, I can conclude that I had never regret entering form 6. I thank God for that, for my friends, for everything that have mould my character and my attitude. And for the final days left, I will make sure I work my hats off, I have promised myself not to do something that I will regret,  I want to get good results, because I want to shine for Jesus!! 

As for the lower 6, all the best in your future studies, all the best in your route to the finale next year, remember, PLAY HARD, STUDY HARD!

a4j首张EP - 甜旋蜜转

This is the first ever EP by a4j, Glad tidings Chinese Church Youth!!
Grab one piece of this product and I bet you will not regret!!

On the 24th of May at 8pm, we will held the BLOOM MUSICAL NITE and we will launch our album that nite, so do come on that nite, its held at our chinese church main auditorium, neighbouring BCM chape.

Listen to the gentle whisper..

As I was writing here, I am telling myself at the same time, to listen to the gentle whisper from your heart, to listen and obey the gentle whisper, whom we call the Holy Spirit.

How many times we have ignored this gentle whisper from our heart, who tries to tell us that there are dangers ahead of us, tries to tell us that which is the right way to do things. Holy Spirit is God, Holy Spirit leads us in all expect of our life, be leaded by the Holy Spirit, so that our life will not be sweyed to the wrong end of the road. Holy Spirit, come and be our all, come to fill our life once again, come and move in us once again, so that we are empowered by you to accomplish things that our Father in heaven have told us to accomplish. Cannot live without you, Holy Spirit..

A trip to Cameron..

Haha, well, during last chinese new year, our family went to cameron for a new year break, its really fun and enjoyable, with everyone pack together, the togetherness sometimes is just too overwhelming...

A tough run in........

It has been a long time since my last post, or even my last 'visit' to my own blog. Hmm, well, kinda busy these days, that is why this blog has recently became a wildland. Hmm, well, life is really wonderful, hmm, having said that, all things that make up our life, no matter good or bad, are meant to make our life an unforgettable one. Life have been reasonably tough these days, having all my studies, ministries, works and all on the line, it is really tough to juggle all at the same time. I have became quite imbalance emotionally because of this situation, knowing that I need to in fully accelerate mode in order to get my 5A and Band 6, and there were so many things I wanted to do in my ministries, this is like taking my whole life to figure it out. But well, God's mind is far better than mine, or you can say, ours' are negligeble comparing to God's mind. Well, when I really sat down and think about it, and at last, I found the equilibrium point. What I am doing, what I am living out, its all for Jesus, the only reason that keep me doing all these, it is Him alone. Well, no doubt it is real tough at times, frustration and emotional imbalance would fill my mind, but every time I go through that, I know that I am one step nearer to what God wants me to achieve, and I know that God knows as well all the things that I am going through, that I can overcome it for He would not give us things that I could not bare (1 Corhintians 11:13). Well, its the route its still on, it will be a tough run in towards the end.............but.......

God will make a way
Where there seems to be no way
He works in ways we cannot see
He will make a way for me
He will be my guide
Hold me closely to Him side
With love and strength for each new day
He will make a way
He will make a way

P/S: Well, not forgetting this, a4j youth EP will be launch soon!!!! Haha, thank God for that..so, pls grab yourself this annointed EP, which will surely impact your life!! 24/5/08, 8pm @ Glad Tidings Pataling Jaya (along Jalan Gasing)..

Being Significant, Making a Difference in life...

Well, haha, glad to be back on this blog again. Really thank God for what and how He has blessed me during the Chinese New Year, really thank Him for everything, love Him so much!! Haha..Recently, I have forgotten which particular day, as I was thinking things, thinking of what I want to do in my future, the Holy Spirit reminded me of one thing, whether I want to be someone of great succes, achievement, position but who did not make any difference in someones' life? Or I want to be someone who maybe earn less, less fame, living an modest life but who make a different in someones' life. Well, honestly, this is a paradigm shft for me. All this while I was thinking to be a man of great success, position, achievment, and I've said that I dreamt about becoming a multi-bilionair, international entrepeunuer for God, and neglecting what God really wants me to do and dream for Him. And I come to know that it is when you follow the will of God, follow the path that He has set for you, follow His voice, that we can really make a difference in life. Being at a right place and right position will enable us to fully utilize what God has given us, and by doing that, and when we are doing what we are good at, we can, be a significant person and hence, making a difference in life. It is not what the majority do that we have to follow and do, it is doing what you want to do, what God wants you to do, that you will flourish and shine as bright as a shining stars. And when we do all that, and through us, that God will make a difference not only in our life, but in life of people who are around us, now that is what I call being significant, making a difference!! Hmm, well, dear Lord, I just want to follow your will, let Your will bhut not my will be done, even it meant to say that I was wrong all this while...I just want to be a person of significant, who makes a difference in lives....for Jesus Christ...

Only for You

Felt so touched by holy spirit, the letter below are dedicated to my Abba Father in heaven.....

Dear Abba Father,

         Father in heaven, this is your son writing to you. Abba father, so so sorry if I've hurt your heart in anyway, sorry for my siliness, sorry for my pride, sorry for making you worry. Abba, you've come to know me even before I am in my mother's womb, you have implanted your destiny and your calling for me in me long before I was born. I'm just so greatful to you that I have this previlage to know you and have you as my Abba. Abba, you know me well, aren't you? Sometimes I thought I was so great that untill I forgot this was acctually all your works; sometimes I get so busy untill I forgot my first priority is to love you and have a deep love relationship with you rather than doing works alone. Abba, I just want to let you know that, I want you more anything else, I want your will but not my will to be done, I want to love you more rather than loving ministries more. Father in heaven, please strengthen me and empower me to do what is right and what I supposed to do, as your son, for I'm weak and vulnerable without you, useless I could say. I will abide in you as how you abide in me. Father in heaven, thanks for everything you've done for me, please coninue to guide me in this life you've given me, let me follows your footsteps. Let me sing you a song, Abba:

Dekat pada Mu itu rinduku
Setiap kataku Kau pun menunggu
Tak ku sangka, ku temukan
Satu kasih yang abadi
Kiniku datang dan ku bawa hidupku

Memandang wajahMu, mengikuti kebaikanMu
Mengejar hadirMu, dalam hidupku
Membawa sembahku, menyatakan kebesaranMu
Mengejar hadirMu, dalam hidupku

I love You, Abba Father....
                                                                                                         From: Your son, Kenneth 

My 2008..

Well, well, well, it has been quite some time since I last posted, or should I say 'visited' my own blog. Haha, well, guess maybe because there were too many things in my mind recently, hmm, haha, well...maybe I can label it as business...Hmm...Its already February, and obviously all of things is up in the running, in all cylinders. This year is a vital year for me, everything I've been doing will come to a real test for me, studies, ministries, relationships and etc. All is down to me to make a decision and say, hmm, its tough but I can still do it, discipline is much the issue. But though it sounds tough, but I believe behind all these test, there is a promise land God has for me, which is waiting for me to inherit it. It is so exciting to know that I have Jesus with me to walk through my life, things that He is going to show me, ways that He will guide me to, is almost like an uncharted journey, but that suites me well, haha, I like adventure!! Haha..hmm..well, as long as Jesus is with me, nothing that could stop me from inheriting the promise land God have in His mind for me. Like Abraham, I'm venturing in to a journey which I dont quite know what awaits me, but hopefully one day, God will call me His friend just like how He called Abraham. Along my year 2008 and my whole life, I just want to be as close as I could with Jesus, to know how He feel, to do what He asked, to go where He goes...My 2008... 

Memories that doesn't fade..

Well, been to a youth leaders camp closing ceremony the day before yesterday. The camp is called the Elisha Camp. I've attended this camp a year ago, it was truly a life changing experience for me. Been into the camp, knowing so many new freinds and great teachers. All of this is still fresh in my memory, as if it just happen not long ago. And on Monday, I walk into the hall once again, but only not as a camper this time. I was on the stage once again, but only this time as a worship leader and stage performer. Mix feelings I could say. But nevertherless I still have all the memories with me, memories that doens't fade...

The One and the only One

 The One and the only One....Well, it was November since my last blog entry, I am supposedly holiday-ing, it turn out to be my 'holidays'. Still have to go school in the morning for almost every weekdays in the past few weeks and at nights I would have to attend practices, meetings and etc...Well, busy schedule? Felt exhausted? Well, Physically? yes, Mentally? yes, Spiritually? No....Although I was  given tasks after tasks, I am greatfull and full of Joy while doing all these. For I know there is a greater cause for what am I doing, for I know at last only things which pleases Him that counts. Been to my church camp, the only thing I have learnt is to focus and set my eyes on  the one and only one saviour, healer, redeemer, truth, life; Father of all blessings, wisdom, talents, anointing and etc....only Jesus..only Him...and it is only for Him that I would do all these...just cannot stop loving You, my father in heaven.....

www.a4jyouth.org

This is considered late, very late instead. This website was launched light years ago (haha, this is just pure hyperbole). It is a cool site to go to. Go and check out all the stuff there, once again, its cool. www.a4jyouth.org

Revival minded..

Well, well.....revival, one of the most frequent word mentioned these days, it has really blend into my life, my blood, my mind, my soul. After all the years we've been waiting, after all the revival conference I've attended, it is only now that I can really say, revival is really coming! It is only this year when I get so revival minded, every time I pray I just couldn't get myself off to pray for revival in Malaysia, in this generation, in this world. God is really on the move, it is up to you and me, whether we are ready to catch up with His move. When I heard Pastor sharing about the New York Revival, Wales Revival and so on, I would cry out to God in my heart...Lord, I now there WAS all the great revival that has swap across the world, but, Lord, let Your revival fall on this land once again, let yor kingdom come and your will be done, let the lost turn back to You, let the weak say I am strong, let the poor say I am rich....let your presence fill this land again!! Jesus, let Your name be lifted high! Mountains bow down and the seas will roar.....let us all be prepare and be bold and strong, to win this battle for God!! Praise the Lord!!

恩典..

哈哈...第一篇华文部落格心得终于出炉了!! 哈哈, 想不到在那么久之后才出现第一个华文字才....哈哈, 没关系啦, 迟到好过没到 =P...最近真的在生活当中学到了很..很...很...很...很...多东西. 很多时候我们认为自己所拥有的是自己应得的, 认为这是本该就给我的, 是因我的所作所为应该得到的回报...但...这是错的!! 牧师在主日分享了3周的'恩典'信息, 这再次提醒了我, 能活着, 能呼吸完全是神的恩典! 更别说能有好成绩, 好的经济景况, 好的家庭....一生都是由神的恩典组成的, 那自己还有什么可夸的呢? 恩典, 是白白给予的一份礼物, 你我不需做任何事情去'赢得'恩典, 因为恩典是白白给予的, 只要你愿意接收你就可以得到!! 那么世上人类可得最大的恩典是什么呢? 美味食物? 豪华车辆? 独立洋房? 不! 人类可得最大的恩典在2000多年前就为我们预备了! 是他! 耶稣基督! 是那位为我们的罪被钉在十字架上三天后复活的那位救世主!! 有了他我不在寂寞, 有了他生命有盼望, 有了他生充满憧憬与惊喜!! 真希望您能与我一起分享这份喜悦!!

The Curtesy of Art of Science & Science of Art

The Art of Science, cool title isn't it?! Haha, well, last Saturday attended a talk on the the Power of Creativity, it brought up a paradigm shift, where I believe that there is always art in science or vice versa. Don't agree? Well, you just have to look around you.......the Seas, the sky, the mountains, the animals, the universe, and last but not least, YOURSELF!!! It is so special, nothing in this world is completely the same, and in every scientific discovery you would know that it requires huge creativity or in other word ArT sense!! And if you see in the artistic field, when you're drawing something, most of the time you are actually following a certain guidelines, for example to colour the background first or go directly to the pot of flowers? That is what we call logical thinking or in other word, Science sense!! The world is made up of both science and art, so it requires someone who could have both science and art in HIs fingertips in order to create such a wonderful world!! And surely that is none other than our Heavenly Father!! He is the father of science and art, He embrace His creation with His unconditional and everlasting love....He has, is, and will continue bless us through the things created by Him, IF ONLY we were to accept it with a open heart, to experience His love and to enjoy His favour, and He doesn't need us to do anything, just by accepting Jesus Christ in to your life, you will have all the blessing in the world. Even though you might still go through hard times, but in Him we could find peace for He has overcome the world! (John 16:33)

To have a Science and Art Pro as a Father, sounds great isn't it?

GReat Formula 1 ending!!

Yes!! Kimi won!! Haha, Ferarri WOn!! Haha, very happy because I've been supporting Ferarri since I started watching F1. I just enjoy watching Formula 1....haha....it is a very very nice sport (you might not understand what I mean, but try la =P) Well, formula 1 race is just like the reflection of our life. The overtaking, pit stops, mechanical break downs, accidents, podium finnish or retired from a race can be well identified as the competition, our holidays, ups and downs, unexpected difficulties, sickness...but the way Kimi Raikonen show his perseverence, patient and calmness to win the world championship even though many people doubted him in the last race that he could pull of a supprise, which he eventually did....So let us all persevere, be patient and be calm over any circumstances to pull of a great victory in our LIfe!! 

Be a Child.....in Jesus!!

Exam is over, thank God for the grace and merecy He had on me, couldn't done this withouth Him!!! Haha, yea, God thought me something recently, that is to be a child in front of Him.....well, this really hit me. All the while I knew that I have to be mature when I'm dealing with things: my servings, studies, relationship with friends and family...almost everything and even when I come before the Lord, I tried to be as mature as I could. But I was wrong in some sense....I realise that I don't need to be a mature man when I come before Him, it is simply because in front of Him we are totaly exposed! He knows what we're thinking and what difficulties we're facing and who the true 'we' are. So there is acctually no point trying to be mature and think: Lord, I am big and mature enough to deal with this problem, so thanks for you offer to help but I think am mature enough to deal with this....end up God will say: Ok then, you do this on your own then....well, I've learnt, to be a innocent, naive child in front of Him, the Heavenly Father, cry out to Him whenever I need help, shout out to Him if I need blessing and surrender all the things that I want to do to Him......

Now I realise..

Just today, I realise something, that my heart isn't BIG enough....Well, from one of the incident happen today, I realise that I was so helpless and weak, selfish....It happen like this: While my mom and I were waiting for the traffic light in the car, one man suddenly pop up and knock onto the mirror of our car, then my first thought was: quickly lock the car!! We didn't bother him, so he went to another car and did the same thing. That driver responded and it seems that he was trying to ask for help or direction, maybe because his car has broke down right behind us.....I was convicted by the Holy Spirit....because Jesus says what we did to the least of people is acctually doing it on Him....then I prayed: Dear Lord, please give me a bigger heart, a bigger heart to serve, to listen, to obey, to contain what you have ask me to do, thank God because in Him and with Him I'm a man of HOPE, BOLD, STRONG and SHARING.......Now I realise...that if I am to be without Jesus, I could be one of the most wanted.....Praise the Lord!!

Greatest honour!!

Yea, came back from tonite church volunteers appreciation nite. This was my first time to attend this occation, but certainly it won't be my last. Well we started the event with a Praise & Worship session, I was reflecting on something through out the session. Yes, it is a nite to appreciate the volunteers after a year of hardwork and goodwork, but I always have this in mind: It is our Honor to serve the King of Kings and the Lord od Lords...it was my greatest honour and it is still my greatest honour now and it will be my greatest honor in the future...I wouldn't mind even if we doesn't get a night like this, it is simply because, just by the fact that God allowed us to serve Him, it is our honour to do so, it is well expressed in a song:

God of my forever
Forever I'm with You
My life is saved with a price
Your sacrifice redeemed my soul

God of my forever
And forever I will sing
My greatest honour will always be
To serve my Lord and King


Thank You Jesus, I love You and it is my Greatest honour to serve You.......

I Surrender....my All...

Well, where should I start things off....Let's see....okay, here is it. Yesterday night, I have song leaded in praise and worship during the service. It was the first time I felt so helpless, so useless, or to expressed in a better way, so 'beh' I should say...haha.....well, yes, because everything seems was out of control, piano not working at first, which causes the pianist and synthesizer to swicth keyboard at times....everything seems just so out of control. But I remembered a lesson tought by our Youth Leader today, Surrender, All. I have to admit it that at times, I do know that I need to surrender, but not All, because I think that there are something that I can do on my own, so no need to ask God to help then....but I was so wrong and I told God that night:"God, I surrnder my All to You.." And guess what, the whole Praise & Worship was simply awesome, they were 'new' musician & vocalist, but praise the Lord they seem like they have been there for years....God is so awesome, and He wants us to surrender all to Him, not because He is a Autocrat but the fact He wants us to learn to depend on Him....To all the youth out there: When you felt helpless and everything seems out of control, surrender it to God, surrender your studies, relationship, work, everything including your Life, let Him guide you and lead you...all means everything, for He is the one who love us more than we love ourself....

The End of an Amazing Race! (Re-posted edition)

Here is another meaningful blog entry, re-posted now...

1st of February 2007:
Haha....once you look at my title...you will know what I am going to talk about.....yes, The Amazing Race Asia has just ended on high.......although my favourite team doesn't come out on top at the end, but it is still a great show to watch........bitter sweet feelings......haha....what can I say, aren't life is more exciting when you doesn't know what will happen next?! It has been 13 weeks for this Amazing Race show but it will be 80 or even more years for our life......disapointment, achievement, all the conflics and unpredictably senario will just enrich my life, indeed, our lives!!!! But one thing myself have experienced is walking side by side with my best friend is really enjoyable and great, just want to thank every friends that have joined me in my race, no matter for long or short, i really appreciate it, well, that's what friends are for!!!!Lastly, me myself with a standing ovation for all the teams in the competition and all those who are still running in your very own AMAZING RACE......Cheers and smilez.......life just can't get any better......

~~thank you my Lord Jesus, having you with me in my race is just amazing......~~

Lost but Found!! (Re-posted edition)

Hello everyone.... on the February 15 2007, something happened (It was posted in my old blog, so decided to re-post it here =P)...

15 February 2007:
my grandfather was LOST but FOUND in just one day......been to so many places to look for him.....now I know how do you feel when you really lose something important in your life.....I walk around like zombee....just keep walking and walking to find him......it is physically and mentally consuming.......it is kind of great when I got the news that he was Found.....great relief......thank you Jesus.......now I know how do you feel for the LOST!!!

Knowing the truth, Living out the truth!

This qoute came into my mind just a few moment ago, it is so impactful....knowing the truth and living out the truth, it is a lesson that all of us have to learn, so that what we do will not collide with the truth. It is always better to walk your say, and say your walk, both are equally important....So, everyone, are you living it out yet?? Haha, chill dude...believe in what you think is right is still not enough, only by believing in the truth that will set your future path upright....

There is only One Life!

Greetings everyone!! Aloha!! Haha......things have really gone great recently, although all kind of responsibilities and expectation were on my shoulder, but thank God I am still able to stand for He granted me the strength and wisdom to overcome every obstacles. Well, it is true isn't it, if you know you will only have one life, why then you want to go trough it in a sad manner?! Of course man, enjoy and utilize it till the max, that's the way to have a fruitfull life!! For there is only one life, think before you act; For there is only one life, do the do's and ignore the don'ts; For there is only one life, seek the truth for your life; For there is only one life, live out your dreams and your passion; For there is only one ife, surrender it to the God All Mighty.......Dear Lord:

One life I lay at Your altar
One love I with You
One word You know I will follow
One heart broken to You

Life Scale?!

I was quite busy these days, having studies, church servings, cociricular responsibilities, and etc all in line, I was put into a situation where I really have to make my life scale clear enough in order for me to achieve what I am opt to achieve. Life is like this, I was all the while in this kind of situation, and thank God, I can say that at the moment I still manage to make my 'scale' clear, although at times I would screwed up everything and make myself in a middle of no where, especially now in Form 6....haha.....and I believe that by the strenght of God, I can continue to make my life scale clear.....and I encourage you, yes, everyone who are reading this, to make your 'Life Scale' clear in order to have a high efficiency, effective, and productive life...And at last, to achieve the ultimate goal of your life....

In Awe of God's work...

It's amazing, unbelieveble, unexplainable.....Well a testimony to hard to keep it to myself...last Fri I had my first meeting together with all the Christian Fellowship's committee, with the English Department. Before this, God had imparted in me a vision and a passion to see my school to experience revival. and that God wants to do something great in the campuses. My vision is Campus for Christ and our theme for the year would be year of Awakening.....well well, this is where God's work take place, It's never me, but Jesus alone shall get all the glory and praise...when i share the vision and the theme, guess what, the Pres and the other committee looked into each other eyes and then turn to me and said: Did you read our mind or we read your mind?! Well well, now i know, it is God who read our mind!!! I was praying for this desprately, and guess what, God listened!!! Hallelujah, May all the Glory and Praise be Unto our Ever Great Father in Heaven!!!

Say what you Do, Do what you Say

Say what you do, do what you say", a simple phrase but with a strong message, but it is so true for everyone of us to follow. When you say something, that means you believe in what you say, and it will bring out a life of what you said...and when you live in a particular lifestyle or you do something, that also means that you believe in the system that you are applying and you would say it out or in other words, promote it. Why? Because you believe it!!! "Live out the gospel and you share the gospel, because if you believe in something, you would not only live it out, you also say it out......" Good lesson, thank God!!!

For who You are

Sometime in this week, I was reminded of one thing: Am I worshiping God for who He is? Or am I worshiping Him because of His anointing, His blessing or His gifts? Well, true true true, God was telling me that He wants us to worship Him for who He is, not because of what He has.....And this concept works in the opposite way too, God love us because of who we are instead of what we have or what we can do for Him!! Make it clear for you and me that God doesn't want us to love what He has but who He is!! For God is seeking those who have a pure Heart for Him, who worship Him for who He is.......

ReTirement?!

2 days before today, the most important figure in my school have said farewell to the school; 2 weeks later, my mom will be retiring from her work after all this year of hardship.The retirement fest is aorund me, with teachers and leaders of honour retiring from their various position. it is time for the new cycle to take place. When the older respectful and proven-efficient generation step down, there is always doubt whether the new generation could fill in to the shoes of the great.....but time and time again it prove that the new generation not only can fill in to their shoes, but they can even bring their succes to a higher level. It was Moses who lead Israelites out of Egypt, but it was Joshua who lead them to the promise land of Canan.....It was King David who wants to build a temple for God, but it was King Soloman who eventualy built it......for the older generation, Happy Retirement......for the new generation, All the best!!!

Bad hAir DaY..

Well well well, what can i say about this? It happened yesterday, before i left for church, decided to do something with my hair, so that it won't look so dull. Well, it turned out to be a disaster. After receiving some negative comment, decided to put a cap on, but it turned out to be another disaster. Soon after i put my cap on, it was at night i supposed to rap, well at least i call it rap, my hair were styled into 'Beckam'-like hair style, but yet it was another disastruos experience......Phew......well well, a bad hair day, but God turn it into His day, it meant to be a bad hair day for me, but who knows in His plan, He was using this bad hair day to let me know.....It's time to do something........with your HAIR!!!! Haha, praise the Lord!!!! Rejoyce in Him always!!!

Give me Malaysia or I die....

It's clearer than the water and the most clear-sky you can ever imagine...well, recently i have been to a conference, a life transforming conference, it had certainly turn my world upside down. It was held few days ago and i won't forget what i have received from God in the camp. It was the first conference that i had attended which is so focus souly on the Revival of Malaysia....and imagine 1000 young people were crying and praying like never before, shouting out to God with all their strength, for the sake of His kingdom to come to Malaysia, for the sake of people in Malaysia. Well, it has certainly transformed me..........and when i heard about the testimony of Revival in Scotland, one prayer which cought my soul: "Give me Scotland or I die!", well.....then i cry out to the lord:" Give me Malaysia or I die!".......it is that desperate everyone gets in the hall, desperate for revival to swap across this nation. It is time, for the young generation to arise and go out there to Fight For Christ!!!! A Big Picture, Big Vision too hard to keep it to myself.....

Ijok + Batang Berjuntai mission

Ijok and Batang Berjuntai, two places where the a4j mission team are going to set their foot on. Well, I'm also in....

17th August 2007
So the first night after packing everything from church, we started our journey around 6.30, yes, total traffic mayhem!! But still thank we still manage to reach there before 12!! Haha!!! But well, before going to the church, we instead went all the way down to Kuala Selangor to have our seafood dinner. Well, it turn out to our appetizer only, why? Because we ate a Vegetarian Seafood  dinner!!! HAha!!! Still thank God we're able to try out some seafood =P. Then later on we've move to the church which was next to a tamil GT church!! Amazing isn't it?! Then, after we have settle down, it is time to get things started. We had our skit practice first, then later on last briefing on the Giant Monopoly Outdoor game entitled Ultimate Player, don't know what is that?! Wait till you experience it yourself...So late or should i say 'early' at 1am in the morning, after we've almost settle everything, then we feel the effect of having only vegetarian seafood.....as a result almost all of us went down to the nearest stall to grab some food.....maggie goreng + ayam + telur mata kerbau....that 's the complete set........after the 'Breakfast', we went back to the church and was thinking to continue on with our undone work...but tiredness overcame, we slept....

18th August 2007
So we sleep at 2.40++ in the morning, ending up with just 1.15 hour sleep. We woke up to finish the undone work and were able to do it on time!! Thank God for granting us strength!!! So as early as 6am++ we departed for the school, NONO, breakfast first..=P After the breakfast, preparation work kicked start at the school field, everything was seem going on well before we started.....but one or two small things we left out kind of make us in trouble a bit.....but everything was in control, if not in our control, surely it was always in His control!! So the game started, with such a great weather!!! Thank God for it!!! Everyone enjoyed!! Including us and i think He enjoyed it as well =).....So the game ended on high!!!

Later on in the afternoon, everyone got exhausted, slept to regain some energy for  there's another great battle await us....At night, the night service started later than scheduled, but again i could say, He was going on with his plan instead of our's...After ice-breaker, praise and worship, testimony, skit and the sharing, this was the most important moment for this was the ultimate purpose of our mission...5+ souls were save at last!!!! All the hard time were worth this moment!!!! Thank God Thank God!!!!! His love was overflowing that night...really really, it is always our vision to build and save young souls!!! Left the church around ten, ate 'Dinner', then head all the way back to our base, Petaling Jaya.....

Hmm, it was indeed a fruitful and fun mission trip, but as i know deep in my heart that "Everyday is a mission trip".....thank God for everything for we can't do anything without Him!!! Praise the Lord fr the work He has done, not us!!!

Love you Mama!!

Today when i reached home, and when i saw my mother, suddenly i felt so so so.....i just dont know how to describe it, suddenly wants all the things come into my mind, how many years she have been there to love me and comfort me whenever i come to her? How many tears she has dropped for me? How many times when i come back to her and ask her for money and she would give me without even questioning me? I just want to thank God really for giving me my mama, love you mama.....And of course, my heavenly Father, who was crusified and nailed on the cross simply because you love us, yes, all of us including you who is reading this......

How far can you go?

Hello everyone, felt like dropping a word or two tonight, after all the things i have experience and after some analyse. Well, these days i am starting to look up to the life of all the great personal, all the great leaders. And i realised they have something in common, they were able to hold up to their job or you call "ministry" in a christianity term for such a long time. Sometimes i  just wonder what drive them on in their life mininstry, as i am here, just 18 years of age, doubted if i could be like them. But thank God really, He had shown me that it is not possible for me to do it myself, that i could do it only WITH Him on my side. This has certainly remind me of something: Sometimes it is not about how good can you be at a moment, but how far can you go, or in other word, persevere.......i certainly wants to walk as far as i could in life with Jesus, wants to be like Moses, Abraham, Job, Elijah or present time like Billy Graham, David Livingstone......O Lord Jesus, just wish that i could be with you untill the end of my life.....

A cut on the hand, show how precious is a friend...

Acctually wanted to write about this few days ago, but still thank God although it was delayed untill today =P. Well, something has make me felt so touched a few days ago. As i was opt to do my biology practical in the lab, well, i broke a test tube and it cut my palm as my friend told me that i pressed on the test tube when i was trying to save it from dropping. Well, end up we were delayed a few minutes and plus a handicaped member which was me. But i felt so touch when they say :"Nevermind, it is ok.." and some words like :"You don't do it..." which they ask someone else to do it....i felt really touched...and that remind me that despite all the bad things stole the limelight in the tabloids, i believe there are still good deeds in people....especially young people....thank God, lesson 3......

the Sun is always there....

Well, this morning when i'm on my way to church, the sky was abit gloomy, the cloud eventually covered the sun. Then suddenly, this thought came into my mind: No matter it is morning or night, autum or winter....the sun is always there!!! And as if God is telling me that no matter when i'm in trouble or in sheer joy, no matter who i am, HE is always there!!! Just that sometimes we cannot see him but that doesn't mean he is not there......yea........lesson continue.....thank God!!!

Pure Blessing!!!

A short one this time, just want to share my experience in my faith. Well in a usual morning just before i start my journey to school, which i think it should be last thursday when this thing happened, i said my usual prayer in the morning and walk down the stairs. And by the time i saw my wallet, i knew deep in my heart that there are hardly any sen left in it, well, it happen at times =P....But i told myself that morning: "Whatever, i have faith that i will still be able to have my breakfast.", then i walked into the kitchen to do something, then suddenly, my mom came in and she gave an amount of money which she claimed to be the scholarship which she had applied for my SPM result. GReat is our God!!!! So fast man!!! CAn u belive it?! It happened just in around 5-10 minutes time!!!! This is what i call PURE BLESSING!!!! Thank God!!!

Still in positive Growth!!

Just felt like wants to share somemore.....i just realise something these days, sometimes i find myself in a very embarassing circumstances when i did something wrong, yes, guilty and all come in, but the thing is i would always ask myslef: "Apala, sudah leader still do such things"...well, sometimes i just cannot get over it and that kind of feelings would haunt me for a few days. As i am still trying to find a answer to the question, this poped up in my mind: Hello friend, you are still GROWING!!!! Well, stunned i could say, sometimes i might just rated myself too highly, and we do sometimes, think that we cannot do anything wrong in our life (especially if you're in a leadership position) and as if we have experience enough and have had attended enough conferens and talks. Well friend, from my personal experience, i truly admit that we must try our best to stay away from failures and mistakes and it is cetainly what i am trying very hard to do and we cannot one day say we're enough. But when things go the other way, lets have the courage to smile and tell others this statement: "Pls bare with me, i am still growing!!!".......aonther great lesson God has tought me.....

LiFe in Form 6!!

Well, it is quite clear for me what course or things that i am going to do after form 5, and yes, after 6 months, now i find myself in a brand new journey of my life, form 6 life....Haha, had a slight taste on it when i witnessed m own siblings who had both gone through form 6, and now, i can feel how they feel and i can experience what they have experienced. For me, form 6 life can be sum up with a simple formulae(Pls bare with me, i juz cannot get rid of formulae =P): Strees + Six form life = Fantastic experience.....when i was chatting with my friends, we all agree that form 6 life is totally different form any that we have experienced so far, and so far, we found out that most of our lifestyle have changed, and we're starting to crack out what we call 'the nerd jokes'....haha....but i really have to thank God for putting me in this situation, so that i could continue to grow as a person...thank God, thank Jesus!!!

Finally.....1st One!!!

Haiyo...really really really.....created this blog like ancient time ago....but now only the birth of the 1st blog entry..haha..well...what to do man...Just want to share my feelings, experiences, and information with ALL of you out there!!!Haha, i really mean all of you!!!! So hope that through my blog you would know who i am and hope that this blog can be a helpful resaurces for all of you!!!! Haiyo...really really really.....created this blog like ancient time ago....but now only the birth of the 1st blog entry..haha..well...what to do man...Just want to share my feelings, experiences, and information with ALL of you out there!!!Haha, i really mean all of you!!!! So hope that through my blog you would know who i am and hope that this blog can be a helpful resaurces for all of you!!!!