Can't time just stop?

"How wish I am 18 now and I can drive myself to any where I want", " How wish I can live my own life, earn my own money and buy the things I want". Aren't these saying familiar? Well, this used to be words said with high hopes and high spirit, but when you are really there, you wish you could take back those words.

Things has changed, many things were left in the memory lane. A fear of growing up? Maybe. Recently I was thinking back the times when I was a little boy, when I have mom on my side, and dad is always there for me, no worries at all, really none. But now, I missed those times, those innocent days, where I could just do whatever I want to do.

It is uncertain what future lies ahead of me, I really do not know. But one thing for sure, one thing that had never changed ever since I took my first breath on earth, my God has never changed. He was, and He is still the Lord of my life, the one who has marvelous plan for me.

Pretty sentimental right? Well, I do at times, when sentimental took over my rasionality.

1 year and more to go!

It has been a year, 2 months and 20 days since we have pledged and committed ourselves to be together. Yes, this is me and my beloved lover, Lea Yee.

Isn't she beautiful? Well, its kind of amazing on how a nerd like me could get such a beautiful girl as my soul mate, its a weird plan God has in mind, but hey, I would be more than happy to be in this weird plan! Many things we have gone through together; Happy times, arguments, surprices, all-that-you-want we have it!

Well, particularly, she doesn't like the way i dress myself, well, she would label me as ugly, or disgusting hair style, but hey, 9 out 10 she is right! Amazing right, but its true, I got to have to buck up myself to be more fashionable, anyone offering a hand? For example how to tell myself to love fashion more than....my books? Thats how she thinks of me, I love my books more than my outlook. Haha, but its kinda fun though because I get to have free fashion advice from her, I love her style, and I love to shop with her, especially recently, she had brought this shop-for-your-need-anytime mindset to me, got to get used to it. =)

People always sees us as a very sweet couple, yes indeed we are! But behind the sweet impression we have work very hard behind the scene, to know each other more, to discuss about our differences, our opinions on things and our future, we have done all those behind close door, and we ripe the fruits! Arguments, or shall I say discussion made us understands more about each other. There were even times when we felt frustrated on each other, but with thorough discussion, prayer and little sweet surprices, the relationship reached another level.

And now, after 1 year plus plus, our relationship is indeed, very very firm. Though still not reach unbreachable, but thats our aim for the years to come.

A letter of committment to Lea Yee:

I will love you for who you are, love you unconditionally. In whichever way I could, I will do my best to fullfill your needs. I will be your listener and will lend a shoulder for you if you need. Whenever you need me, I will be there for you physically, if not in any other possible way. Love you forever with all I could.

A letter of committment to Jesus Christ:

Dear Jesus, thanks for you leadership in this relationship. Please continue to guide us, lead us, so that we would love you more than we love each other. Help us to be focus on you, help us to be more mature, help us to cling on you and stand firm in you. Jesus, we love you, I love you!

Does it worth it?

We rate things in this world by what the particular thing worth. How much is a Prada bag worth? Is it worthwhile sacrifcing time to study? Is is worthwhile believing in something that virtually does not exsist? Tags were put on things in the world; this particular fellow is poor in his study, that girl is pretty, or even racist as times. Why? Why do we tag people like this? Since when the culture of labelling became the force behind the markets?

Is it worthwhile to do something that is right, even if you know you will suffer from that decision? Once a quotation says: Freedom is something that you ought to do, no what you want to do. Certainly. Suffering for the right course seems a "Righteous, Religious" statement, however, it applies to our daily lives. Isolating time out for studying, you will have to say 'no' to facebook, twitter and so on. Is it suffering? Yes, definately for most people, including me. Is it the right thing to do? Yes, most certainly without question.

Yet why there are so little people out there whom are suffering for the right course? Well the answer is, lack of courage. One thing, in my opinion seperating great man and women from the norm, is that they have the courage to do what is right to do, and suffer for what is right to do. Take Thomas Edison for example, over thousands time experimenting for the right materail for bulb? Crazy it can sound, but yet, after thousands of trials, he finally found the perfect match. Suffering for the right course? And to name a few more, Lincoln fighting for the rights of the Blacks, Mother Theresa sacrificing her life for hundreds of people in India.

Its easy to say, but can we do it? Or can I do it? Its hard, its tough, and it needs courage, tons of it.